Also.
Writing your exes into books backfires. Badly.
I'm trying to remain sober and I get music like this.
Makes me want to just 🫠 for lack of a better word.
It's the easier route. It's how I am able to laugh. I feel... Ahh
Sick?
I can't eat. I can't sleep unless I stay awake until my body gives out.
I want whatever nonsense this is to stop.
The time it happened, I tried offing myself again. Stupid? Yes, yes I am.
That was like 9 months ago. The space right before Christmas. Got so sick on meds I scared people.
I would even prefer just crying and sobbing again to this.
Why because I will feel bad but it's temporary.
I am too much.
Either I ghost people unintentionally or I spam them and they end up hating my existence because I'm nonstop.
Usually there is no in between.
What do I do.
I can't handle constant contact. With anyone. Just trust me, even Bastian knows.
I feel like I'm slipping into a crack and it's just going to get worse. Flgosjdueuwheue
Sok reader. I will live for now.
Aaan
S
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