Hey reader. Didn't really mean to come back so soon but I'm hurting and I can't release it. It sits like a stone in my chest, bringing me lower and lower.
I'm being the strong one. The one who has most answers. And I don't have the rock I used to. He was ... He understood me. Even the fucked up parts I hid from everyone else. He understood them. And it hurts because I won't ever have that again.
Spent most of my life with him. Doesn't feel right to be in a new year without him.
I'm being strong though. It's what he would have wanted I think. To be strong. He was always afraid I would fold under pressure. Yeah, I thought about it. And the chest pains I'm having don't help. But I'm ...
I'm as strong as I can be.
Brave face.
That's all we can ask for.
We had a short lifetime. And that's what we get. Fuck.
S
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