I'm good reader, I reached out to a nurse and she said if I am taking micro doses that it's safe until Thursday. So I'm back on the wagon, oh well. I'm still very good at staying on this wagon of mine.
Have a friend checking my reddit if I have to answer questions, because I don't care for it at all. It was a place for me to scream the void and let go of my feels, and to provide support for others. No longer, but I'm not throwing away a 5 year old account I forgot I had lmao.
My roommate is fucking goofy. He knows I'm down so he keeps coming in my bedroom, with some of the either thirstiest traps or funniest bs. He knows I care about him even when I tell him he looks like a gorillas nutsack as hair.
He also tells me to commit war crimes but I won't tell him where the fuel is hehe.
My old boss, not new boss, is going to start the new hire paperwork so I can go back on the 28th. It's giving me 18 days to get better, so I can stop ghostwriting. Its good money but it goes to the worst fucking people.
I want to feel purpose again. While I was there, I helped people. So many fucking people. Like IRL not random shit I do online. I've done that before too but smaller scale.
Once I met this chic who was 2 steps from homeless. She was sleeping on an exes couch with her 9 year old and scraping pennies to get food. I went around the neighborhood here and got her a full fridge. She was recently off meth, hell of a drug, and stayed clean til she left the place and moved down south to be with clean family.
Don't have to do things, I just want to help people. I didn't share about her because she was ... Fuck. She was bad off. And talking about her in the moment would have only meant I wanted clout. No. When families are hungry, you fucking feed them. If you can't afford to help, then rally the troops. This world is hard enough without going hungry.
So the ex of hers, he's kind of a douche, but his ex roommate ended up being my coworker. And we have a really great relationship when working. He texted me last month how he misses me because the new people are shit. And don't appreciate him dancing.
The man played UnTiss UnTiss UnTiss for 5 fucking hours and dancing nonstop. Omfg
He's a dork but hey, it's the people who know me. Who love me, and who see me as I am.
He's the only person I know I can talk about my childhood and it ends in laughing, never crying. Ever. Even when we talk about the shit that hurt either of us. Trauma bonded my ass, we let the irony run off our faces with laughing tears.
Who else would've pointed out the only reason Cordell didn't die was because he had been taking the same med for years. Dumbass. Anyway, I'm excited to see him again. I haven't completely been a stranger to them but I stepped back because I wasn't sure if I'd be coming back at all.
Anyway. That's how my night is going, here's to high high hopes and laughing. Cause fuck you, I'm laughing.
S
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