I am

 Hey reader. 

Think it's time I close up shop again and just go write in a book somewhere. 

I'm tired of the world. Tired of myself. Unable to explain to anyone I know because I keep too much inside and don't explain. 

Told Bastian I think. Eh. I can't even remember to be honest. 

I've been high for over a week save for one day. 

Am I getting better sure.

Better at deflecting 

Better at avoiding

Better at rotting

Better

I am going to give myself less than a week and I will be better 

I have to be better for ren faire. I'm not missing it because people keep me up at night running through my head 

I already took an edible for tonight. Going to be riding the wave of melancholy til I reach home. 

Oh and Peacekeeper, watching that tonight again. Trying to find reasons to stay alive. 

As it was

S