Rex has been incommunicado today, and that bothers me because lately I've been *snap* *snap* *snap*
Now I am waiting. Bastian has some... people he will meet soon and I hope the best for him on that. Was upset that he wasn't upset last night and it took me a long time to just sleep. Kept waking up and waking up and looking at the clock and waking up and thinking I was somewhere else.
Reader it's not possible to go back to the past, as of right now. However if we watch the past in our memories, it is easy to get lost in them. Maybe I need to climb out of the box and just go back to what I was before.
Easy right?
Yeah... I didn't think so either. I can try though. I probably need to. Squash it before my brain makes me dream more. I don't like those dreams because of one thing:
As of right now, it will not ever happen. Yes, I could go and breach multiple vows and break promises and do it anyway, but that won't solve anything. It won't quell the undulating inside of me. I don't know what will to be honest.
In all of this talk, I never asked him if he found me the same way. For all I know he could think me the same I think of myself. While I am an ogre, I am a kind one. I won't kick you out of my swamp. I won't hurt you when you come with your pitchforks, I won't eat eyeballs either. Well ok fish eyes are one thing man...
I know what I am and what I look like, it's ok.
I need to go drown myself in some words. Or something. Weaning myself little by little off a med isn't helping. Don't see the doctor for a few weeks and I hope she is ok with it.
Who knows
As always and never
S
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